Except of the bland "Obama / McCain / Ron Paul / Hillary / Huckabee in 2008," I haven’t spotted any good political bumper stickers this campaign season. All same, a few days ago a kerfuffle broke out in a neighborhood not far from my home when one woman took exception to a bumper sticker on a neighbor’s pick up truck. The woman was accused of making terrorist threats when she declared that "she would get someone to take care of" the offending neighbor. Hmm. Bumper sticker wars. Not as unlikely as you think. I have displayed political slogans in support of Democratic candidates on my car. Living as I do in a blood red Republican suburb, I worry about my vehicle being vandalized when I park in public places. Houston Chronicle columnist Rick Casey has an article in today’s paper where he laments that the 2008 election has spawned bumper stickers which are more witless than offensive. ( Casey and I both agree that one anti-McCain slogan among others, shows some evidence of political wit : "Agnostics Against McCain: Some things we know for sure.")
….The worst thing about the bumper sticker is that it is witless — but I’m afraid that describes this campaign on both sides. A search of Internet sites selling anti-Obama bumper stickers yields such sophomoric specimens as:
"The only difference between Obama and Osama is BS." (With Bin Laden’s face on one side and Obama’s on the other.)
And: "Waterboard Barack Obama."
The one that did strike me as racist featured "Nobama" with the "o" in the form of a gas mask. Then: "He doesn’t pass the smell test!"
But the available anti-McCain stickers are not totally innocent, joining the nation’s comics in assuming that picking on someone’s age is not the sin that racial comments are.
One shows a caricature of McCain and says, "No Country for Old Men." Another: "McCain for President in 1928." The closest thing to anti-McCain wit I found was, "Agnostics Against McCain: Some things we know for sure."
The racism against Obama and the agism against McCain are mild compared to the sexism on display against Hillary Clinton.
"Yeah, that’s what we need … An angry woman with nuclear weapons."
And: "Why not Hillary? Because no one needs to go to war every 28 days!"
Think those are funny? They’ve been discounted from five bucks to three. Go wild. If the bumper stickers lack wit, it may be because the official campaigns have offered little inspiration. Both seem to have chosen whining over wit. McCain, to be sure, has said some funny things, including some intended to be funny, such as his recent remark that Phil Gramm might be a future ambassador to Belarus. The Obama campaign, on the other hand, appears to be afraid of humor.
If ever an incident cried out for a humorous response from a candidate or his spokespeople it was the recent New Yorker cover featuring Barack and Michelle as Muslim terrorists in the Oval Office. But the Obama folks tsk-tsked instead. Obama needs to hire away from The Daily Show whoever came up with this as Jon Stewart’s suggestion for a response:
"Barack Obama is in no way upset about the cartoon that depicts him as a Muslim extremist. Because you know who gets upset about cartoons? Muslim extremists! Of which Barack Obama is not."
Getting back to bumper stickers, I have one more thing to say on behalf of Ms. Gragg, who has been charged with a terroristic threat — not for supporting Obama but for allegedly saying something to the effect that she would get someone to "take care of" Mr. McKain later.
At least she didn’t behave like somebody in Oklahoma who apparently was offended by a pro-Obama sticker on a Prius (I fear this story has become overloaded with stereotypes). According to the Tulsa World, last week a man in Broken Arrow reported that someone had "keyed" the bumper sticker on his new gas-sipper, damaging the car in doing so.
Here, however, is the good news: We live in a country where a probably empty threat and the keying of a car represent newsworthy levels of political violence.
Accidental Blogger 
6 responses to ““Some Things We Know For Sure””
Even as the columnist tries to make light of the bumper sticker and others of its ilk, many of the 500+ comments which follow the piece are full of disturbing racial insults.
I haven’t seen many bumper stickers here beyond the occasional Obama ’08, and now, more recently a McCain ’08 or 2. There are of course some diehards, who still cling to their Bush-Cheney ’04 stickers. Not much witty stuff in my neck of the woods.
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Another “secret”:
6. Although I’m generally not fond of bumper sticker approaches to conveying so-called information, I did once come up with one that somebody–but not ALA–really ought to market: Librarians Overdue It.
Get it? Yuk yuk.
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Hey, I like it. I am a big fan of bumper stickers. When the kids were young and our family used to take long driving vacations, I took note of everything on the bumpers that passed us by.
How about the ALA putting some oomph in their slogan with:
Librarian babes: they are well stacked.
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Ooh, watch it, Ruchira! You’re wandering into sensitive territory. Perhaps less risqué: Librarian Babes: Check ’em Out.
This photo caused quite a stir when it was first appeared. Personally, I find it a little disturbing and exploitative, even though I know it was taken all in good fun and entirely with the subject’s consent.
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That photo is actually quite nice and not necessarily exploitative. It is almost a silouhette, we can’t see the young lady’s face and she is dressed in no-nonsense work clothes.
Hey, let’s get away from the sexist and the risqué. How about: Librarian Hunks: Check ’em Out.
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The clothes are not exactly no-nonsense, I’d argue. They’re certainly professionally appropriate and attractive, but the photo is arguably as much about the stiletto heels as the lighting and contour of the woman (who, by the way, is a serious brewer of beer). Those shoes on that step stool do not mix.
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